The NoPhone is a device that does not perform any of the functions of a phone. The sole purpose of this device is for the sensation of carrying your phone around with you, but without being able to perform the necessary functions.
What Is The NoPhone?
Almost every adult in the world has a smartphone at this point, which can be used in a number of different ways. You can find directions to a friend’s house with GPS positioning or you can view every profile you have on social media websites. Your phone connects you with friends and family electronically, but there’s something missing. Most of these interactions occur with your face buried in your little screen, which doesn’t offer a lot of face time. By using the NoPhone, you can solve this problem easily.
When you first start reading about the NoPhone, it first may seem like a prank. The makers of this “device” were featured on Shark Tank, advertising their brand new product that actually doesn’t do anything. There are no speakers, no battery, and no screen of any kind. In fact, in a hilarious twist, the duo (Van Gould and Chris Sheldon) show the phone’s ability to take a selfie by turning the phone around to expose a small mirror.
You may think you are missing something during their screen time on the show, but you aren’t. This product isn’t actually designed to be used as a new phone. Instead, both Gould and Sheldon focus on everything the phone can’t do for you. With this device, you are free from the risks that a normal phone would offer you. You won’t send drunken text messages to your ex, and you won’t go over on your data from browsing through Facebook. You don’t even have to panic if you lose the device, since there’s nothing stored on it anyway and it is cheap to replace.
This product seems to be a way for consumers to break their phone addiction in a similar way that smokers try to quit smoking. Much of someone’s addiction is the physical act of holding their phone, just like a smoker needs something to do with their hands when their avoiding a cigarette. By having this useless device in your hands instead, you train yourself to stop looking at your phone all the time, giving you the chance to notice the world around you.
Since there’s no battery to weigh down the device, this product is incredibly lightweight and easy to carry around. You can throw it in your pocket or purse without worrying about scratching the screen or accidentally calling someone.
If you’re still waiting for the catch, there is none. This product has no actual functions, but the physical act of being able to hold your phone is sometimes a comfort. It is especially helpful for getting out of situations that require you to split your attention from the task at hand. All you have to do is hold your phone up to your ear to pretend that you are talking to someone else.
Improvements On The Original NoPhone
Just when you’ve become convinced that the NoPhone is basically just a plastic toy, the company takes their product one step further by introducing the NoPhone Zero. On the brand’s website, the company calls this new device “the least advanced phone ever created by mankind,” since it features no logo or fake buttons. In fact, this product basically looks like a piece of rectangle plastic, and it is even more useless than its predecessor.
Purchasing the NoPhone
The normal cost of the NoPhone is only $12.00, but the website presently has the price marked at $10.00. When you receive your package, the company is almost comedic about what you will receive.
First of all, you will obviously receive the NoPhone, which ironically comes with an instruction manual. The company teases that the manual describes how not to use the device. The product page also states that you will get “real friends” with the package, which is most likely a jab at the lack of face-to-face interaction since the start of social media and smartphones.
Contacting The Makers Of The NoPhone
The only way you will really have to contact the makers of the company is if your device gets lost in the mail, or if your device is damaged. In these events you will need to send an email to email@example.com. Otherwise, you don’t really need to speak with the company at any time.
There are no special instructions for using the phone, and you will not receive a refund.
The NoPhone is meant exclusively for entertainment and habit-breaking purposes, since you can do absolutely nothing with the phone. While the original model has a logo at least, that’s pretty much the only useful thing about the device.